this was sent to me by a composed co-worker of my company. Joe is his name and he asked me to share it with you guys:
Dear CEOs and mayors
let's present ourselves: we are a union that represents a substantial part of your work forces. But don't let that sound threatening: we come in peace! As a matter of fact, we have some proposals to increase your profits!
You may have noticed that we spend more in your shops/restaurants/... than what you pay us. This is because our organisation has some really wealthy godfathers that multiply our salaries to reward our good work ethics. So whatever you pay us, you will get more back.
In order to do this, please:
* raise our salaries to whatever skill levels you can handle
* stop asking us to go to trainings after work hours: it only results in you paying us less and hence us buying less of your stuff; also, we prefer to go shopping with our wives or go eat out at a restaurant with our families than studying after work
* mayors: launch the project to increase salary expectations any time you can, we will love you for it!
* mayors: once the education index is 5 or higher, stop holding science conferences! The only reason you do it is to pay us less, which will make us spend less, which will attract less shops/restaurants/... to your cities AND attract more factories, which will attract more commuters, all of this will hurt the city budget. Also: we don't like it when the city is flooded by these nerds going to the science conference. It makes want to grab their pencils out of their shirt pockets and snap them in front of their thick glasses wearing noses whilst grunting this is what we'll do to them if they don't get out of our way immediately! Just kidding...
Of course, this is just a first line of suggestions. We are open to discuss them with you to get to the best possible solution for everybody. Maybe you would like to discuss this amongst eachother too.
Kindest of regards
Joe
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